NOBAMA

I’m tired of listening to some marriage equality advocates defend Obama’s flip-flopping on the issue of equal rights for gay people. To remind everyone, Obama advocated marriage equality before he made his bid for the presidency. When Senator Obama became candidate Obama, he abandoned gay marriage for federally recognized civil unions, a separate but equal institution. Talking about civil unions allows Obama to speak out of both sides of his pretty, pretty mouth. While running his mouth and for office, he promised to actively pursue an equal rights agenda, including overturning unpopular Clintonian compromises, like “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and DOMA. President Obama has broken so many promises to the gay community, I’m beginning to feel like that chick from the latest season of The Bachelor; the one who suffered the taken back proposal. Yes, I feel like Obama asked me to marry him, and, after I said “yes” at the ballot box, he said, “You know, I think I’d rather marry Rick Warren instead. He’s got such a nice family with so many wonderful connections. Sorry ‘bout that proposal. I really meant it when I asked. No hard feelings!” President Obama, you don’t get off that easy.

Since I’ve come out of the anti-Obama closet, several people have reduced my position to, “Noël’s a single-issue voter.” This isn’t the case. Regarding fundamental reasons he was voted into office, Obama has backtracked and veered right. I don’t like his positions on the Iraq war; nor do I see eye-to-eye with him on the latest torture developments. Oversimplifying my position constructs a straw man argument. But, even if I were a single-issue voter, equal rights is a pretty compelling, timely issue.

While I’m on my soapbox, allow me to respond to a ridiculous refrain to which I’ve read and listened. “He’s got bigger fish to fry! We’re in a war. Look at the economy.” Believe it or not, Obama can focus on the war, economy, AND equal rights. Need I remind you that the Civil Rights Movement, second wave of feminism, and Gay Liberation took place at the same time we fought in Vietnam. And, if we’re talking economy, have those of you singing the “bigger fish” refrain seen the hundreds of millions of dollars gay marriage injects into the economy? Obama couldn’t even be bothered to make a public statement about Proposition 8 the day the California State Supreme Court supported the ballot initiative. He didn’t even urge all the people protesting AROUND THE COUNTRY to stay calm and lawful. His first public statement was fittingly provided in Los Angeles the day after the court affirmed the tyrannical rule of the state’s majority. In his first public acknowledgement of the ruling, he MADE FUN OF a protester's sign outside of the event, remarking that he didn’t know which “promise” the protester thought he “broke.”

I’ve seen enough emotionally abusive relationships to know when “later” means “never”; I also know when I’m being slapped in the face (e.g., Rick Warren, marriage equality backtracking, and other broken promises). Wake up! Now’s the time! Not later. Democrats hold control of Congress AND the presidency. Democrats don’t get endless opportunities to TURN WRONGS INTO RIGHTS. Now. Not tomorrow. NOW. My dream of “hope” and “change” shouldn’t die the minute the Obamas hang their clothes in the White House.

I understand why so many gay people and other progressives defend Obama’s abuse. Abused people make a number of illogical rhetorical moves to justify why they suffer. Is he normally sweet? Do you think being with him is better than being alone (or without a party)? Are you convinced you deserve the abuse? Or that, in time, things will get better? Is he just acting this way because things are “bad at work”? Wake up, because he won’t wake up unless YOU DO. His political ambitions ARE NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOUR RIGHTS.